Dear Emma: 1st Birthday Letter

Dear Emma,

I can't believe that you are already a year old. These past twelve months have flown by in a whirl wind of happiness.

When I found out I was pregnant with you I was scared and a million thoughts flew through my mind. Would you be healthy? Would I be a good mom? What if something happened to you during the pregnancy? But, after nine long months of pregnancy I was ready to meet you and after the very long 36 hour labor you were finally born and laid on my chest, and you were perfect. .

Those first few days were hard. Your dad and I were exhausted from the labor and delivery and you cluster nursed for three nights in a row. It got better after night three. You were so precious and such a good baby.

Watching you grow this past year has been such a treasure. I love watching your little personality blossom. You are always very hesitant to do something new and sometimes it takes you a little while to get it, but once you do nothing can stop you or get in your way.

While you love me a lot, you are definitely a daddy's girl. Your whole face lights up when you see your daddy and the love he has for you only makes me love you both more. I can't wait to continue to watch you grow up and see what God has planned for your life.

I was thinking the other night about this past year and all the things you have taught me since I became your mom.

Since I've become a mom I've learned that I will rarely ever eat another hot meal in the near future. I've learned that my food is no longer my food, but our food. 

I've learned that spit and other bodily fluids are no longer a big deal when all over me. 

I've learned that the days of wearing jewelry and actually fixing my hair are gone for a while, unless I want a bleeding ear, a choked neck and patches of hair missing. 

I've learned that I am a fanatic about car seat safety, to the point it annoys your dad sometimes. 

I've learned how much I can miss someone, and it's a lot.

I've learned that the sound of your laughter while being tickled by your dad can make me cry with happiness and brighten my worst mood. 

I've learned that my love for your dad can grow even more when I watch him with you. 

I've learned that it's ok to need a break and some me time because it will make me a better mom. 

I've learned that some days I will hate breastfeeding, but that most days I will fall more in love as your little fingers close around mine as you drift to sleep while nursing. 

I've learned that 36 hours of labor, with 26 hours being med free was totally worth it to hear that first cry and finally get to hold you after 9 long months. 

I've learned that being a mom is hard. 

I've learned that being a mom is the best job in the world and I couldn't imagine life any other way. 

I love you so much Emma and I praise God for Him choosing me to be your mom.

Happy 1st birthday Emma!